#thoughtpost: it's not you i miss - it's the memories
People say that when a relationship comes to an end, you feel like your whole world comes crashing down. That you may never love again.
I beg to differ.
It's only natural that in the beginning you feel sad, lonely and confused. I think that's just because he has become a huge part of your daily life, a routine even. You meet every once a week, you watch every new movie that comes out together without fail, you talk over the phone till wee hours in the morning everyday.
When a relationship ends, that part of your life becomes empty. You start by trying to fill up the empty gaps that was once occupied by him. Maybe you'll hang out with a bunch of friends you haven't met in months because of him. Maybe you'll start staying in the living room after the family dinner each night instead of locking yourself in the room just to talk to him over the phone.
As the months pass by, you look back and think of the happy memories that you had with him. That park that you two are always seen together, that favorite restaurant that he always brings you too, that night walk home.
Yet I realized something. I don't miss you, I miss the memories we had together. I don't miss the arguments we had, or the differences that became all so clear as the years passed. I miss having someone I could rant to and who would never judge me for all the horrible remarks I made. I miss being able to act all goofy, vulgar, silly and to be myself with you.
These are all the memories I'll never forget, and yet I'll forget you. You're no longer a large part of that memory, but instead, the act carried out is the part I miss the most.
Sometimes things happen for a reason - but I'd never believe "if it's meant to be, it will be". I strongly believe that once a chapter in your life ends, you should never flip back the pages. Continue looking forward, ad maiora if you will.
It's not you I miss - it's the memories.
I'm more carefree than I ever was, I enjoy this freedom that I never had for all those years. I'm happy now, and I hope you are too.