After the boys in National Service (NS) goes through the Passing Out Parade (POP), comes the time when your boyfriend is posted out to a unit allocated by the government. It could be a medic, sergeant, officer, in either Tekong, the Singapore Police Force (SPF) or Maju Camp.
In K's case, he has been posted out to the Singapore Civil Defence Force (SCDF) as an Officer Cadet (OCT). I won't deny that there has been quite a change especially after a week of block leave, thus inspiring me to draft out this post.
1. Lost (All Over Again)
You finally manage to see your boyfriend for an entire week, listen to his voice and hang out with him on proper dates without a care for the time. He suddenly leaves, has another period of confinement and leaves you somewhat as lost as you were when he just enlisted into NS.
Especially when he has been enlisted to a tougher unit, his admin time is lessened. We hardly have the time to talk. Comparing this to the first night in Tekong where we had about ten to twenty minutes to talk, we only had a simple one minute call.
What You Can Do
Think of the time when he first had his confinement for two weekends, think of how you got pass it and think of the joy when you met him after. It's not too hard now that you have done it once.
Busy yourself and make sure you complete all your tasks (e.g. school work, bathing, household chores) as soon as you can. This will be beneficial especially he is allowed a longer admin time.
2. Feeling Worried
He tells you about one of his fellow mates that was admitted into the Institute of Mental Health (IMH) because he was unable to take the training.
What You Can Do
Try your best to find out what his new unit is about so that you can place yourself in his shoes. Never undermine what he is going through! It is best if you can find first hand experiences from those who have been through the same unit he is currently in. Relay the experiences to him and let him know what he can expect.
3. Feeling Useless (All Over Again)
He tells you about his training, comparing it to the time he had in the Basic Military Training Centre (BMTC). You feel useless because you can't be there for him. You want to give him a hug to make everything feel better yet you can't.
What You Can Do
Send him encouraging texts and let him know that you're always there for him. If he has any rants, let him say it all out. This, however, does not mean that you become his punching bag. He needs a listening ear and more encouragement then ever so do not pick a fight and quarrel with him.
Learn to be more patient (patience is a virtue) and understand that since he has always been treating you like a princess, it's time for you to treat him like a prince.
Stay strong girls! His BMTC period was tough in the beginning but passed in the blink of an eye. Two years may seem long, but you can do it!
With love & till next time,
mel ♥
mel ♥
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